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Give the gift of novelty: unusual, fun present ideas |
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Thursday, 29 November 2007 |
 Black Bars are just one of the many novelty gifts available in the University Bookstore. Check out the multimedia section for a video shopping guide and slideshow. Photo by Anna Donlan
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by ALLISON CASEY
Lifestyles Reporter
by LINDSAY CRAVEN
Lifestyles Reporter
The holidays are quickly approaching and your shopping list continues to grow. Not to mention some names that keep adding up are the people you dislike the most or didn’t plan on shopping for.
Fortunately, the Appalachian State University Bookstore understands your dilemma, and offers an array of gifts to keep the disappointments high and your wallet full.
Cat Butt Stickers
You
can put any cathedral to shame when you turn your residence hall room
or apartment windows into a stained glass work of art…made of cat
butts. That’s right, advertised to be stuck where the sun don’t shine,
you can turn your windows into a glowing shrine to the feline derriere.
Buy this for: The unusual friend with a strange attraction to your pet.
Price: $4.99
Ouch! Voodoo Doll Toothpick Holder
The typical Voodoo Doll calls for pins in precise areas to make your
sworn enemy squeal in pain. If that isn’t quite good enough for you
then try adding splinters to that excruciating poke. Prepare dinner for
friends and let them unknowingly assist in the torture of your ex as
they enjoy their hors d’oeuvres.
Buy this for: The friend with many enemies or the bitterly single chef (make sure you’re on their good side first).
Price: $7.99
Sunglass Black Bars
“Be Shameless and Blameless”…or just be $9.99 worth of confused after
this pointless purchase. The Black Bars glasses can provide you
anonymity in photos or to the general public on the sidewalk. They can
also provide you with thousands of dollars in insurance bills when you
try to wear them as sunglasses while driving. Their main purpose seems
to be to protect you from those embarrassing photos people tag of you
on Facebook.com. Buyer beware, the Stupidiotic Black Bar Glasses are
not sufficient for censoring other areas of the body.
Buy this for: The friend who always seems to find him or herself in awkward positions at parties.
Price: $9.99
Drinn Mobile Phone Holder
Does your phone feel neglected when you set it on the floor? Protect
your mom’s investment, as well as your phone’s sensibilities, with the
new and handy Drinn Phone Holder. Sure, it’s only half a foot higher
than it was before, but it’s the consideration that counts. Your mom
may not be happy that $3.49 of your Express account went to pay for it,
but your phone will thank you.
Buy this for: The friend who would sacrifice their first-born child for their iPhone.
Price: $3.49
Umbra Bungee Card Case
Do you ever feel like your “Magic, The Gathering” cards are too far
away when they’re in your pocket or Star Wars lunchbox? Now feel the
comfort of them lying against your heart with the Umbra Bungee Card
Case. With unique safety features like the bungee cord to protect
against strangulation from bullies, the Umbra Bungee Card Case allows
you to whip out your elf at the flick of a wrist, and stun any of your
competitors.
Sadly, the Umbra Bungee Card Case only fits standard size playing cards, and cannot hold the Umbra Meow Playing Cards.
Buy this for: The friend that can speak Elvish fluently
Price: $3.99
LED Light Love Bubble Blaster
The bubbles in this bubble blaster are actually made largely of Love
Potion Number Nine. Yes, we know. You thought it didn’t exist. Now,
the LED Light Love Bubble Blaster’s soapy, sappy bubbles will turn even
the most bitter and hopeless singles into little love bugs. Guaranteed
to make your friends actually care what you did on your date last
night. For best results, use on Sanford Mall.
Buy this for: The friend whose academic careers far exceeds their love life.
Price: $8.99
How Drunk? Coaster Set
If the five kegs at a party weren’t enough to encourage your excessive
drinking, now the bookstore has provided you with a coaster set to help
you gauge the various stages of drunkenness. As you continue to drink,
you will move from various coasters, starting off with ‘Sober’ then
‘Tipsy’ followed by ‘Drunk,’ ‘Plastered’ and ‘Wasted.’ The next
morning, when you’re drinking orange juice, you can move to the
‘Hungover’ coaster.
Buy this for: The friend who aspires to be an Amy Winehouse or Pete Dougherty protégé one day.
Price: $8.99
Umbra Meow Playing Cards
You’ll be amazed to learn what you once thought was your furry Siamese
friend is now an Ace of Spades. Now, when you’re sitting at home alone
playing solitaire, you can identify any of your 52 different cats.
These cards are sure to be a hit at your next Bridge party.
Buy this for: The friend who eats cat food when the budget gets tight.
Price: $3.99
HotFlops
You should walk carefully because you will have 15 balls of varying
sporting equipment resting on your toes. Sure, it’s uncomfortable, but
it’s a small price to pay for being fashionably tacky. Be particularly
careful with the soccer ball HotFlops, as people will have the
uncontrollable desire to kick at your toes, resulting in severe injury
and a chipped pedicure.
Buy this for: The wannabe athlete whose toes are just too pretty for cleats.
Price: $22.99
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