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Annoying quirks complete, enhance romantic relationships |
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Tuesday, 12 February 2008 |
There is always that one little thing about a person that can drive you up a wall.
Biting nails. Being late. Calling you every five seconds on the phone.
It doesn’t matter how much you love a person. There is still that one thing you can’t help but notice.
For my boyfriend of over two years, there are quite a few things he does that drive me crazy – and not the crazy in love way either.
It’s his ideas like playing scrabble online while talking on the phone as a long-distance, pseudo Valentine’s Day date.
It’s
his incessant calling five times a day with play by plays on how his
entire day has been going and even a commentary on what he ate for
lunch at noon.
I hate talking on the phone with my boyfriend. And since it’s a long
distance relationship, communication is pretty much limited to only
that.
After our last fight, I finally told him I was through with it. We were done.
That night he called and left a message saying the same things he always did and the very things I was trying to avoid.
I immediately called him back and told him the facts: “No, I don’t want
to talk to you. No, you can’t call me pet names. And no! I don’t want
to know what you had for lunch today.”
That was that. I thought I would be free from the annoyance of his
mind-numbing phone calls, but it wasn’t as simple as I thought it would
be. It was different like I had hoped but it wasn’t the ‘different’ I
expected.
When he did call, he called me “Nikki.”
My name? He never says my name.
Sure, I told him not to call me pet names, but I never realized how
often he actually did call me things like “beautiful” or “gorgeous”
when saying hello.
In fact, it was almost as if it was the first time he had actually
called me by my real name at all. He probably hasn’t called me “Nikki”
since I was 13 years old.
But as if that weird feeling wasn’t enough, something else happened. He stopped calling me five times a day.
Yes, that’s what I wanted all along, I thought. Now though, I found
myself missing his dorky little comments during the day and his random
“I love you” messages he cluttered my voicemail box with.
I found myself checking my phone after class out of habit only to find that nothing was there.
Then a horrifying revelation hit me - I missed the one thing that annoyed me most.
Sometimes we take things for granted, but how often do you stop and
think about the little things you don’t even imagine you would or
should appreciate to begin with?
It’s not just with significant others either. Whether it’s parents and
their nagging ways or even the annoying friend who complains about
everything, no one is perfect. Often times, it’s the irritating quirky
aspects that make them who they are.
Sure, there will always be that one or even two things about a person
driving you mad and it might never go away. But it just depends on
whether or not you love them more than you hate their quirks.
I’m sure my quirks irritate him at times, too. That’s what you get when you have a relationship between two imperfect people.
We’re back together now and I’ve got my online scrabble Valentine’s Day
date on my calendar. He still calls me a couple times a day but now
I’ve come to appreciate it and he’s been trying harder on his end as
well.
Yesterday he called me only four times.
Oh, and he had a taco for lunch.
Nikki Roberti, a freshman journalism major from Melbourne, Fla., is an intern lifestyles reporter.
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